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  • Lyn Reed

Be Who You Are (not what others want you to be)



Do you think in colour the way our friend the frog looks? Or are you a black and white thinker?  Do you catastrophise? Do you mind read what others think?  If so, when we run into difficulties - as we all do - we can get stuck in severe thinking traps.


Many people feel like this.  We can be the most visionary, inspiring individuals - yet deep down we may feel like failures.  Sometimes we can be perceived as arrogant or dismissive.  Which is unfortunate as the backlash can be hurtful and damaging to our self-esteem.

We all make mistakes,  This makes us human  When those in public life put a foot wrong, they are often destroyed for having failed.  Young people can grow up and see what happens when people make mistakes.  They get punished.  It can bring a fear and a chronic loss of self-confidence.  


The rise of the digital world has made this divide all the more stark.


How often have we heard the mantra - 'if we just put our minds to it we can be anyone we want to be!' This is just  not helpful or realistic.  We all have our limitations, our own imperfections.  Yet with reflection and growing self-awareness we can discover who we are and person we want to be.


It is important for our mental health that we be our own authentic selves.


We live in a culture where it commonplace to feel the need to beat ourselves up for not being perfect.  Yet we CAN let ourselves off the hook.  So what if we discover we are a bit neurotic, introverted, different?


I say - let's give ourselves a break.  Strangely, being prone to worry and self-doubt can work in our favour, it can be an aid too our success.  We just need to remember we have no idea what it's like to be anyone else. We can't change what we can't change.  We are who we are.

Self-acceptance is the key to understanding ourselves.


And if that means being a bit wacky - well, that's okay too.


Tags:

self esteem catastrophise self-acceptance

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